What???!! Mila's birthday is on the same date as my wife's?

Can my day be ruined more than that???





...just kidding! Happy Birthday!

Thanks boba....))
It could be a hat trick on birthdays yestreday, including John Lennon's one today(though it's nearly a halfday behind in America) ...or perhaps even more...
There you are...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v ...

Chinese Call Centre

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?

Operator: Yes, you can speak to me..

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to
me.. Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan .. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone ! But
what's this urgent matter
about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan
was involved in an accident.
Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital.
Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the
hospital, then the accident isn't
an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for
this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Ree ..

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry . Now give me your name!!

Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree ..

Caller: Oh .....God.... ...

From --
Good Wan! =))

This is hilarious!))))))

to go along with the above one:

What is your name?
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen's Laundry."

"Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How in hell does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter.

The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen's Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner."

The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me... is right here," replies the old man.

"You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?"

"Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say,'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?'"

"I say Sem Ting."

May I introduce my best Friend Lena. It took me quite.. some time to persuade her to get registered so to welcome her here. And it has happened! Lucky me ;-))))
-------------------------------
This is interesting. Could Lena introduce herself?

Hi MSL!
I am sure she will....but it's an English tradition to introduce a newcomer to the Club;-)

Ok, consider this is done. Waiting for Lena to talk. :-)

Hi to all!
Yesterday we went just for a walk and suddenly I saw a couple of nice mushrooms "подберёзовик" which I have never seen here before. So I picked them up and brought home. Cleaned and cut them into small pieces and left drying out...Perhaps some time later I will cook a mushroom soup. While in the forest I notice that local people have no idea re edible and inedible/poisonous ones. So when they see a mushroom they either leave it or knock it down with a foot or a stick...Funny people...)))

A note from and Adv..

XXX is looking for a pilot to perform the duties of a XXXXX. Responsibilities include safe conduct of flights, providing excellent customer service to passengers, and performing other duties and activities as determined by the Chief Pilot. Duty hours vary according to scheduled flights. Evening, weekend and holiday hours required "
Is quite intrigued by....other duties...)))

2 Mila
XXX is looking for a pilot to perform the duties of a XXXXX...
----------------------

Ok, observing the Google returns on request XXX it is logical to assume that OTHER duties concern piloting itself ;-)

подберёзовик is brown cap boletus

Regards,

Slava

Thanks, Slava! I was lazy enough to browse for translation...)))

MSL
You are probably right.....;-) and yet the ad is a bit funny...))))

Mila Love

always at your service

Hi to all brushuppers!
Today, the 13th of October is English Language day.
The details are down here:
http://news.uk.msn.com/uk/arti ...
So Happy birthday to English language!

Nice occasion. Congratulations to all the brushupers! :-) Yet just returned from English club - nobody knows about the event. Including teachers of English :-) I had a chance to outdo them ;-)

So MSL
you managed.... to steal one on them ;-)))) Well done!

Hi to all!
A nice-looking young lady is to captain a plane...
"But I am not sitting in a cockpit to be a woman," she said. "I am here to be a pilot. And our schedule has not been changed to accommodate us."
the rest is here:
http://www.smh.com.au/executiv ...

Hi to all!
Though for a while before offering tongue twisters to you.
"A tongue twister is a phrase or sentence which is hard to speak fast, usually because of alliteration or a sequence of nearly similar sounds. It helps develop speech skills & helps in speech therapy."

To get the full effect of a tongue twister you should try to repeat it several times, as quickly as possible, without stumbling or mispronouncing.
There you are:

-If you understand, say "understand".
If you don't understand, say "don't understand".
But if you understand and say "don't understand".
How do I understand that you understand? Understand!
*****************
-I thought, I thought of thinking of thanking you.
*****************
-I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
*************
-Double bubble gum, bubbles double.
***********
Betty bought butter but the butter was bitter, so Betty bought better butter to make the bitter butter better.
*************
A sailor went to sea To see, what he could see. And all he could see Was sea, sea, sea.
***********
Six slippery snails, slid slowly seaward.
**************
I thought a thought.
But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought.
If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.
*****************
Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"
***************

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!
***************

She sells sea shells on the sea shore she sells sea shells no more
**********
I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit. And on a slitted sheet I sit. I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit. The sheet I slit, that sheet was it.
***************
Any noise annoys an oyster but a noisy noise annoys an oyster more.
********************
SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE ,
BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS,
ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES
**********************

The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.
**********************
If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors?

baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo, baboon bamboo......
**********************
The thirty-three thieves thought that they thrilled the throne throughout Thursday.
********************
Daddy draws doors.Daddy draws doors.Daddy draws doors.
****************
Friendly Fleas and Fire Flies
******************
If you notice this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing.
****************

If Freaky Fred Found Fifty Feet of Fruit and Fed Forty Feet to his Friend Frank how many Feet of Fruit did Freaky Fred Find?
****************
Penny's pretty pink piggy bank
****************
"When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"
*****************

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
wheres the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
********************
Crisp crusts crackle and crunch.
**********************
It's not the cough that carries you off, it's the coffin they carry you off in!
**********************
Tie a knot, tie a knot.
Tie a tight, tight knot.
Tie a knot in the shape of a nought.
**********************

Freshly-fried fat flying fish
********************
Jolly juggling jesters jauntily juggled jingling jacks.
***********************

Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit,
did Billy Button buy a buttered biscuit?
If Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit,
Where's the buttered biscuit Billy Button bought ??
**************
She saw a fish on the seashore and I'm sure The fish she saw on the seashore was a saw-fish.
************************
Swan swam over the sea,
Swim, swan, swim!
Swan swam back again
Well swum, swan!
**************
If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.
*******************
Mr. See owned a saw.
And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw.
Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw
Before Soar saw See,
Which made Soar sore.
Had Soar seen See's saw
Before See sawed Soar's seesaw,
See's saw would not have sawed
Soar's seesaw.
So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.
But it was sad to see Soar so sore
Just because See's saw sawed
Soar's seesaw!
******************

A tree toad loved a she-toad
Who lived up in a tree.
He was a two-toed tree toad
But a three-toed toad was she.
The two-toed tree toad tried to win
The three-toed she-toad's heart,
For the two-toed tree toad loved the ground
That the three-toed tree toad trod.
But the two-toed tree toad tried in vain.
He couldn't please her whim.
From her tree toad bower
With her three-toed power
The she-toad vetoed him.
*********************

Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep.
The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed
shilly-shallied south.
These sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack;
sheep should sleep in a shed.
*********************
You've no need to light a night-light
On a light night like tonight,
For a night-light's light's a slight light,
And tonight's a night that's light.
When a night's light, like tonight's light,
It is really not quite right
To light night-lights with their slight lights
On a light night like tonight.
**************
Of all the felt I ever felt,
I never felt a piece of felt
which felt as fine as that felt felt,
when first I felt that felt hat's felt.
********************
I thought a thought.
But the thought I thought wasn't the thought
I thought I thought.

Enjoy and keep on brushing up!

THE STORM

They were together in the HOUSE.

Just the two of them.

It was a cold, dark, stormy night. The storm had come quickly and each time the thunder boomed he watched her jump.

She looked across the room and admired his strong appearance...and wished that he would take her in his arms, comfort her and protect her from the storm.

Suddenly, with a pop, the power went out.... She screamed...

He raced to the sofa where she was cowering.

He didn't hesitate to pull her into his arms.

He knew this was a forbidden union and expected her to pull back.

He was surprised when she didn't resist but instead clung to him.

The storm raged on...

They knew it was wrong... Their families would never understand...

So consumed were they in their FEAR that they heard no opening of doors...just the faint click of a camera......

http://photofile.ru/users/boba ...

Happy Halloween!!

Great! the picture and the story!
Thanks boba :-))))

The 20th of october is International Day of the Air Traffic Controller.
Happy day to all our ATCs!
We know your job is to make air traffic safe and sound and it doesn't matter what weather or other conditions you are working in and with. So glory to you all! and Thank you all for your courage, responsibility and reliability!

A big torpedo for a big ship!

MSL
What are you trying to say?))))

Yes, but mentioning a torpedo....))))You don't want really to .....?

I meant a big ship :-) This is you, who focused on torpedo ;-)

Oh, I see....This is a relief, then...)))) Not a word any more, I promise.

Yes, don't worry so much about ships like that. You'd better worry of yourself when flying by: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/U ...

That is quite possible nowadays, the so-called "friendly fire" (((

Mila, just for clear understanding. Generally I'm for worldwide peace and universal brotherhood. But things like that weren't made to scatter flowers over people heads. Thus I mean exactly that war machines are not the appropriate subject for tender emotions. Like draws like you know.

Agree, war machines are designed to kill....

Good morning to everyone!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v ...
Let it be good and peaceful start of the day!

FW: NEW OFFICE POLICY

Dress Code:

1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary.

2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders" category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy.

Lunch Break:

* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.

* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere..

I loved that!!!!!))))

I'll put it as "gentle" reminder in the front of my desk))

Heh! That's a kind of "neu ordnung" :-)

I think that this is a kind of "the recession" could be described and new policy on cuttings and budget remodelling..))))not quite sure as for german interpretation, though. As I think tha latter is a bit too strong...Sorry, MSL ;-)

Are there any F1 racing fans?
Was quite interesting and dramatic one today in Korea.....

No need to apologise Mila. I can't forbid if you want to live this way :-)

MSL
Many thanks, perhaps this is the best way to treat pricky "customers"! We all have our views and opinions and we have right to talk about them through and with....;-)))

BTW
We are somewhere 500 clicks away from another celebration! ;-)))

What do you think of this jumbo flying low?
http://video.uk.msn.com/browse ...

The pilot has just decided to follow his grandmother's advice to fly lower and slower :-)

Hope so...))))

I've come across a correct translator :-)
http://funnytranslator.com/

"This is no excuse for missing work. "

...20 translations later we get:

"Существует никаких оснований, чтобы делать свою работу."
;-)

MSL
It's really nice one..)))

Just read
"Did you know that the three most difficult things to say are:
I love you, Sorry, and Help me".

Overlooked an idea from a neighbouring thread ...
being stuck in a traffic jam, you will have a choice:
be miserable or make the best of it....
Any ideas...as we are definitely heading towards our first thousand hundred clicks shortly!

Hi to all who are far away... right now...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v ...
This is an Australian singer Tina Arena.

perhaps she is more famous for her "Im in chains", rather popular in 90-s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v ...